Europe. Here I Come...

Today I leave for Europe and I can hardly wait!  Travel is something that I love to do but havent done much of the past few years.  I guess that's what happens when you have real job and responsibilities.  How I long for those college days when you could skip some classes and run away for awhile!

How many of you have been outside the country? or even farther outside your state?  I will credit my parents with giving me a sense of adventure and love of traveling to new places.  When I was eight our first family vacation was to South Dakota to see Mt. Rushmore and the Badlands.  We stayed in a tiny motel and shared the 4x4 foot pool with a bunch of bikers.  Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, we chose to visit South Dakota during the Sturgis Bike Rally!  Our family mini-van was surrounded by bikers the entire way.  It definitely made the the trip memorable.     

Regardless of weather you take fancy vacations or you are forced to stay in the Red Carpet Inn, where there is nothing red carpet about it!, you are bound to have a few adventures.  At the very least you got to leave home for awhile and experience new and exciting things.  People are always telling me how they want to travel more yet they spend money on other things.  My car has a cracked bumper and has started to rust.  But it is not a menace to the road so I would rather go to Europe:)

Today, at 6:30pm, I am embarking on a week long adventure of who knows what.  Whenever I travel I always keep a journal and this time I will share my adventures with you.

TO BE CONTINUED...

The List...

How many of you out there are list makers?  I’m not just talking about honey-do lists or grocery lists; I’m talking about Life lists.  People make lists for all sorts of reasons.  The Bucket list, for example, is a list of things you want to do before you die.  A Love list is a list of traits you want in the ideal mate; tall, handsome, not a moron etc.

The thing about lists is that they are easy to make but hard to get through.  How many times in your life have you been able to cross every single item off of your list?

Last year I wanted to have an amazing summer, so I made a list of things I thought would be fun to do.  I called it my “Summer List,” because I am incredibly original.  I started off the summer with much anticipation and motivation.  This was going to happen and it was going to be awesome!!  However, life threw me some curve balls and I found myself in mid-July without one single item crossed off my list.  Rather demoralized, I halfheartedly completed a few tasks and deemed it a moderately successful summer.    

This past weekend, my friend Lauren and I celebrated our birthdays by going dancing and going to Kings Dominion to ride roller coasters.  About half way there I realized that going to Kings Dominion was something on my “Summer List” that never crossed off.  “Pretty cool,” I thought, “I’m going to cross something off my list.”  Sure the list was for intended for the previous summer but hey, I still did it!

That got me thinking.  In essence my “Summer List” was a few fun things that I always wanted to try or do.  The only reason that I stopped trying was because of some ridiculous time constraint I gave myself.

When we have a list of things to do and restraints on when or how to do them, the integrity of the list gets lost.  People let themselves be held back by age, time, or expectations.  Too many lists just sit around and collect dust because people have forgotten or given up on them.  If you hit 30 and haven’t traveled out of the country or landed our dream job or dream mate, you tend to crumple up and throw away your list.  But in reality who cares if you cross off things before 30 or after 30 or after 50?  The point is that you CROSSED THEM OFF!

If there is something you’ve always wanted to do, or multiple things you’ve always wanted to do, then get up and do them.  Time isn’t waiting for you and it will most certainly pass you by.  Lists are simply a compilation of things you want to have, see or do!  Cross a few things off your list and you’ll be amazed at how spectacular it feels!!

~E

The Summer List: In Review!

(Black-Not Accomplished, Blue-Accomplished, Green-Work in Progress)

1.       Get a Tan-Last summer, this was most certainly not accomplished.  So far this year I have purchased a few tanning sessions in order to stave off the inevitable burn.  We will wait and see.  I’ll let you know come September.

2.       Go Paintballing-What kind of mood was I in when I wrote this list? Now only moderately appealing.

3.       Make it to Kings Dominion-It took me a year but I did it!  We walked onto every ride with no lines and did some twice.  Twenty four hours later I am still a little dizzy and motion sick but it was worth it!!

4.       Learn to Play the Guitar-I learned one really easy song but then I got lazy and quit.  Perhaps I should pony up for some professional lessons. 

5.       Run a 10k-On the Agenda

6.       Race in a Sprint Triathlon-Have a training plan and I am definitely, almost positively, for sure, maybe going to do it.

7.       Go Boating-I have a standing invitation for a day of boating fun.   My only hesitation is the Redneck Factor.  I am the flame and they are the Moths and it would be like bringing a flame to a Moth convention.  Also, with this crew, I don’t know if my liver could handle it.

8.       Have a Bonfire and Make S'mores-That was pretty tasty.  I think #8 needs to be redone a.s.a.p.

9.       Take Surfing Lessons- No idea how that one is supposed to happen but I’ll keep brainstorming.

10.   Go Sky Diving- If I can save enough money and can find people willing to go then it’s on like Donkey Kong.

11.   Go Bungee Jumping and/or Slingshot-That was ridiculously fun.  I swear I saw to Chicago!

12.   Go to a Nats Game-So close yet so far!  I’m going to a Brewers game.  Does that count?

13.   Go Horseback Riding- I know some people with horses so this could be a possibility…

14.   Learn How to Shoot a Gun-  The motivation is a little low on that one.  Guns are scary yet I feel I should learn about them…

15.   Ride on a Motorcycle- There is one reason why this wasn’t accomplished.  Thought of Me+ Speed+ Pavement+ Pain= Not happening yetJ

16.   Stay up all Night and Watch the Sunrise on the Beach-Whitney, if you are reading this, I think Spain is the perfect place for this one because I will be 5 hours behind and the chances of me staying up that late are about 1000x better!!!

The Waiting Game...

(The Jeopardy Song)

Do do do do /do do do

Do do do do/do/do do do do do

When this song gets played, every JEOPARDY contestant knows that Alex Trebek is waiting for their answer.  Waiting for answers… (heavy sigh).  I don’t know about you but sometimes I get tired of playing the waiting game!  We wait in traffic, we wait in lines, we wait our turn.  We wait for things, we wait for people, we wait for service, we wait for answers, we wait for change.  Seriously, how many hours of our lives do we spend waiting?

Patience has never been my strong suit.  Some things are better than others.  For instance I have become a very patient driver and line dweller, unless of course I’m in a hurry.  I detest being late for anything. 

Some thing I have a hard time waiting for is food.  When I’m hungry, I have to eat.  It’s  like a bear in the woods.  There are certain times during the day when I need to be eating and if I am not, it is quite an unpleasant situation.  Knowing this about myself, however, I am usually prepared with some sort of small snack to hold me over until a meal can be arranged.

Moving onto bigger things, when it comes to waiting out life’s unknown answers, I do a pretty decent job.  I know deep down that it just takes a little patience and a lot of faith.  But no one on this planet is an ace at the waiting game.

While celebrating my impending birthday,  the waiting game became a topic of discussion between my friend Wendy and myself.  Birthdays are always a time of reflection.  However when that period of reflection gets mixed with Vodka, thenconversation, shall we say, gets a little more animated.  You see, when I mix Vodka with mild irritation, my patience for waiting in general disappears.  Nothing and no one is safe.  Anyone who has been privy to an amusing yet over-the-top rant on the bouquet toss or been on the receiving end of a disgruntled New Year’s Eve text and/or phone call, can tell you this is true. 

Vodka and obscure rants aside, whether it is in line or in life, everyone gets tired of waiting.  Life is full of puzzles and paradigms, and there will always be questions that need answering.  Why did this happen? Where is my life going?  When will I get a job?  When will I meet that special someone?  When will I have children?  When will I catch a break? When is this waiting game going to end and when will I get some answers?

Hang in there!  No one ever really knows where life is going to take them.  You will always go through periods of faith and periods of doubt, and you may not always love the answers or see the logic, but life has a way of working out exactly like it's supposed to. 

Think of life as a long grocery store line.  At first its OK.  You’ve accepted that it may take a while and you’re willing to wait it out.  As the minutes tick away, and you are stuck behind a woman that is apparently stocking up for nuclear disaster, you start to get a little edgy and irritated.  But, just when you think you can’t take it anymore, the cashier says to the woman in front of you, “Would you like the receipt with you or in the bag?" YES! Freedom is upon us!! (heavy sigh) 

Throughout life you will surely find yourself in the middle numerous grocery store lines.  When you do, remember to take a deep breath, grab a vodka/tonic and the ear of a good friend, and know that someday soon the wait will be over!

~E

Facing Fears...

This week I want to further explore an idea that was brought up in last week's blog.  That is the the role that fear plays in our lives.  Fear is a very strong and powerful entity.  It is one that, if you let it, can control your life.  I remember watching an old episode of Oprah where this woman refused to go out of the house because she was afraid of frogs.  On one hand I found this woman completely crazy and in need of serious mental help.  On the other, I understood her fear because I too have an unnatural fear of both Raccoons and Ostriches.  The main difference between this woman and myself, however, is that she has let this fear of frogs run her life.  Her fear has prevented her from living a full and happy life outside her home.      

Take a second to think about all the things you are afraid of.  Some common fears most of us have are heights, spiders, snakes, and confined spaces.  Personally I have a fear of heights.  Being the somewhat clumsy person that I am, I don’t do well with heights and the possibility of impending doom.  On such things as ladders, roofs, castles or the Empire State Building, one little trip or loss of balance could send me plummeting to my sidewalk death.  Falling on my face is something I struggle with at sea level, why on earth would I enjoy tempting fate 400 feet in the air.  Although I participate in most historical or sightseeing adventures, I spend the entire time wishing I were on the ground.

Interestingly enough, when I’m strapped in, like on an amusement park ride or while rock climbing, my fear of heights isn’t an issue.  Knowing that there is someone or something always there to catch me makes the experience much more enjoyable.

But fears, as we know, go much deeper than ladders or frogs.  Fear of Success; Fear of Failure; Fear of Marriage; Fear of Divorce; Fear of being hurt; Fear of being happy; Fear of disapproval; Fear of having everything you’ve ever wanted.  There are so many things that people fear, both consciously and unconsciously, that there is no possible way I could list them all. 

It’s a pretty backwards notion to be afraid to be happy but it is a common problem.  Sometimes in order to be truly happy you have to put yourself out there.  People spend their lives building thick concrete walls around themselves that help protect them from pain, hurt, sadness, judgment and even love.   

Being a rather sensitive child and young adult, I started building my walls at a young age.  Every time I got hurt or scared, I would reinforce those walls until I was sure that they would hold.  I always had a strong fear of being a seen as a failure in school, in sports, in relationships and disappointing those I cared about.  As most people do, I also had a fear of being hurt or vulnerable and to some degree a fear of having it all and being happy.  What if you have it all and it all gets taken away?

Last summer I decided that I was done with fear.  My life coach and I had been working together for a few months at that point and when I went home I decided that I was going to do some of the things that I never thought I could do or things that I was afraid to do.  With my friend Michelle cheering me on, I strapped myself to a bungee seat at the Wisconsin State Fair and screamed my little head off as they shot me in the air and flung be around a bit.  At one point I could see all the way to Illinois!

Tackling the one ride that I was too scared to try gave me the confidence to start face my fears.  Over the past few months I have slowly been chipping away at that wall and it feels pretty amazing.  My wall is by no means gone, and sometimes I have to stop myself from trying to rebuild it.  But it’s about progress and moving forward. 

I have risen to many challenges within myself this year and I have faced many fears.  Not all of them were easy and I didn’t always love the outcome but at the end of the day I know that I can live my life without ever saying ‘What If?”  When you get to be 80 years old, do you really want to say to yourself, “What would my life have been like if I had had the courage to     (Blank)    ?”

On my list of challenges left to face are; sky diving, singing in front of people (going to need some singing lessons before that one),  ride a motorcycle without having a panic attack, go to a firing range and completing my first 10k and Triathlon. 

Whether you’re scared of something tangible, like snakes or raccoons, or you’re afraid to tell someone how you feel, afraid to speak up, afraid to be who you are, afraid to take a leap of faith,  afraid no one will like what you write, just remember that everyone is afraid of something.  And never let fear hold you back from happiness.

~E

PS I want to hear all about your FearFacing experiences