Destined for Greatness...

The other day during a phone conversation, my friend boasted, "yup...I'm Destined for Greatness.’  After I recovered from that overwhelming display of modesty, I responded with, “What does that mean?” He didn't know but was sure he'd figure it out someday.

How does one define ‘greatness’ anyway?  The question has been sitting on my mind.  So in order to find the answer, and calm my ever inquisitive nature, I went to the one place that always has the answers to life's little questions, Google. 

After searching for 'define greatness', I clicked on Famous Quotes about Greatness.  Surely the most brilliant thinkers of modern day history provide the insight I was looking for, wouldn't they?

First up, William Shakespeare;

“Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.” ~ William Shakespeare

What a beautiful sentiment.  However it is entirely unhelpful.  Although I'm sure Shakespeare is  correct, he has failed to help me answer my question.  Let's try again:

Second batter up, Gandhi;

"As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world-that is the myth of the atomic age-as in being able to remake ourselves." ~Mahatma Gandhi

We are heading in a better direction but I think I'll to have to come up with the conclusion all by myself.

In order to achieve greatness, you have to figure out how you will know when you can achieve it.  If not you are just wandering around never never land and searching for something that doesn’t exist (like a band of lost boys or misfit toys).  And while searching for the proverbial holy grail of greatness, you will indoubtedly fail to recognize all the everyday greatness going on around you. 

For a long time I was under this illusion that my life wouldn't be great until I had the exact body I wanted and a fabulous, jet setting carefree lifestyle.  Well reality smacked me around a little in my early twenties and I saw the light.  Greatness is an illusion and is entirely based on how you define it.

For many years I searched for a me that was better than the I that I was.  In my twisted adolescent head I was simply not a good enough version of myself; I was not ‘all that I could be.'  It is a highly stressful and dissatisfying way to live, with disappointment around every corner.  Not recommended for long lengths of time. 

So what do you do about it?  Glad you asked.  Someone told me that all I had to do was start list of what I had that was pretty great and every time someone gave me a compliment I had to write it in a little notebook to remind myself of why I was great to others.   It sounded ridiculous but I did it anyway.  Something worked because today I think I'm pretty freaking awesome and other people think so too!  I know because they tell me and (here's the key) I listen to them!

I also know that greatness in life is all about choices and sacrifice.  For me, career success is important but not what will define my greatness.  For some people maybe it is.  You can define greatness in your life by anything; career, spirituality, wealth, family or friends etc.   

I would love to come to the end of my life and say that I was able to make money off of this whole writing thing (and quit the 9-5 rigmarole).  Would a #1 bestseller add to my sense of greatness? Probably; but, like I said achieving greatness is all about choices.  You have to make conscious decisions in life that are going to affect everything.

For example, Monday night I had a choice of going to the gym or meeting my friends for $2 Burger Night.  I chose the burger.  Correction, I choose my friends.  At the beginning of this year my schedule went from working 35ish hours a week, leaving me plenty of time for my social life, writing and the gym to coincide, to suddenly working 9-12 hour days and sitting on I-95 for at least 1.5 hours a day, if not 3 or 4 (a horrific fate for those of you who haven't experienced it first hand).

So here we are, well into October, and what I've got is 10 extra pounds, absolutely no endurance/muscle tone and a seriously neglected blog.  I have only one thing to say for myself, “Eh…I had fun.”  Some of you may have perceived this fall off the wagon a failure.  But how can you fail when you weren’t even trying and making conscious decisions the whole way to not care and have fun!?! 

When I first moved to Virginia I gained 20 lbs in 6 months because I completely gave up and stopped trying, that was a failure.  This time, I feel like it’s simply time to get back to feeling like me.  I have not one regret about choosing my friends over my workouts this year (which didn’t completely die, averaging about one half-ass gym session/week) but I also know now that life is calmer, it is time to once again focus on me.

So, sayonara 6 pack beers!  I'm going for those 6 pack abs.  Good bye chocolate covered pretzel snacks and mango cheesecake on occasion.  It is time to whip this puppy back into shape because at the end of the day all I want is to feel good about what I’m doing.

My greatness may just be the ability to help other people find theirs.  Although I am slightly on the competitive side, I never had the need to be number 1 all the time.  It just seems lonely at the top.  Someday a bestselling book would be nice.  If I can ever figure out a way to complete a manuscript then I’ll let you know.  But right now, I am much happier to say I got to spend as much time as I could with some pretty awesome people and had as much fun as I possibly could on a budget!

So my recommendation to you is to figure out your own definition of greatness and evaluate what it takes to get there.  Then, figure out how to be happy with what you’ve got.  I’m pretty sure that is a) the only way you will actually achieve greatness or any goal and b) you will be much better off once you actually get there!

Feels good to be back!

Catch you on flip side,

~E 

Shake Shake Shake that Ass Girl...

This is going to be a manifesto for all my ladies out there (and fellas too) who need to shake off some of their assets…and by that I do mean your butt, your gluteus to their maximus or the wagon you're draggin.

I, like many women out there, have been blessed with what is popularly referred to as a Pear shape.  Some people are Apple, Hourglass or Boyish figures but no matter what the term is, it essentially means that your fat likes to settle up top, down low, in the middle or a combination thereof.  Last week I was redoing my measurements, to see where these pounds have settled, and all 10lbs have seemingly gone to by butt!!  What in the hell!?!  It was the only measurement that grew! (Frustration)

Every week, I hear Apple shaped women complain that they have only lost weight in their legs while their Double D’s remained completely intact.  Having what I affectionately refer to as the ‘incredibly shrinking boobs,’ and an ever expanding backside, this sounds like my dream come true! It is often difficult for me to relate to the problem of giant boobs but everyone has a fat problem, and that I can relate to. 

No matter where your fat decides to sit, everyone wants to know how to get rid of it.  The Answer:  Hard Work…bam.  Diet and Exercise.  Those two pesky words have been around since I was a kid!  And they don’t seem to be leaving anytime soon. 

Since this whole weight loss dilemma will be going away anytime soon, I have compiled some information that will hopefully help you stick in the fight and eventually win the battle.

The first thing you need to remember is that every body is different.  It is simple and yet wildly forgotten.  There are skinny bitches out there that have never had to struggle with weight but its ok, don’t hate them.  It will only stress you out.  Just count the ways you are better than her, like any normal person would, and continue on your way. 

Some women can lose weight really fast, others not so much.  Some women build definition and strength really fast, most don’t.  Young beats old every time, accept it.  When you don't use it, you lose it!

Here is another very important thing you need to remember; most men have no idea what they are taking about when it comes to female weight loss.  I repeat: Men and Women DO NOT lose weight the same way.  Men will almost always lose faster than women, and it has nothing to do with how hard you work in the gym or how good you are on your diet, it is just biology and it is better for your psyche to accept that now.    

Let’s break it down because it seems to be a continual issue.  Biologically speaking, men naturally carry more muscle mass than women.  They have more testosterone which makes them stronger and faster with more muscle. A man’s essential fat is around 3-5%.  A woman’s essential fat is around 10-16% cuz we make the babies (we all learned this in middle school). 

Obviously there are genetic factors and lifestyle factors but I am just talking about general biology. We’ll take John and Jane for example.  John and Jane are friends who are the same height, weight, age and general physical condition.  They decide to go on a one mile run to see who burns more calories.  John does.  John naturally has more muscle and the more muscle you have the faster you burn calories.  That’s it; you can go home.  The argument is over! 

That being said, if Jane drastically increases her weight training and metabolic rate (and John sat on the couch being a lazy slob) she may be able to compete with him on calorie burn in a few months.

Here is how you handle yourself when an uninformed male tells you something about female weight loss:

Them-“If you ran the same as me and got in as good of shape as me, you would burn the same calories as me.”

Me-“yeah…no.  That’s just stupid.”

The final and most important thing you need to have to be successful in your weight loss is some good ole fashioned motivation.  Just saying you want to lose weight is not enough motivation.  You are going to need more.  The fact is either you have it or you don’t.  Sometimes when you want it to be there it isn’t, unfortunately.  It took an impending trip to Vegas and the fact that my arm jiggles when I wave to spur me back into action.  Motivation is a fickle creature that comes and goes but sometimes it just takes consistency and some good ole fashioned stubbornness to get it back on the right track.

So, GET UP and shake that ass to the gym, outside or wherever!  Figure out how to make the jiggle, jiggle a little less before the holiday season!

Here is my recipe for success:

1)      Some form of exercise 4 days a week at least

2)      Track everything that goes in my mouth (even if it is really bad) & shoot for 1400-1600 calories/day.  Force myself to eat vegetables for at least one meal a day

3)      Drink water, de-stress, don’t beat myself up and make friends give me inspirational/motivational praise on a consistent basis.

(Example: There is less junk in your trunk! Woot Woot!)

4) Say good-bye to the nightly beer…I will miss you the most!

That’s it, pretty simple.

The End

~E