How 'bout I think inside the box...

Everyone is always telling you to ‘think outside the box.’ Go outside your comfort zone.  Challenge yourself.  Do something new and exciting.  Take a risk.  Take a chance.  Take a leap of faith.  But has anyone ever thought that maybe once in a while you just want to stay in?  Sometimes the box is perfectly nice, warm and inviting.

Going beyond the pale is great.  If you never challenge yourself then you can never reach your full potential.  Taking risks and having new adventures is essential in life.  You learn about yourself, you meet and interact with new and interesting people.  Going outside the box is an important and necessary part of life.  

But let’s face it, always thinking outside the box can be quite exhausting. Take 'Blind Dates' for example.  Now Blind dates tend to get a bad reputation and here's why.  Essentially, blind dates are a leap of faith.  You are agreeing to meet said person, typically knowing no more than their name, rank and serial number.  Throw in a few hobbies and general commonalities and you have got yourself a date.  You have absolutely no idea whether or not you will like this person or what the future could possibly hold but for girls, at least, a blind date holds the possibility of happily ever after. 

Generally speaking most girls can determine in about four seconds whether or not this person is worth an hour of their time.  If I am sitting there engaging in the first date chatter while thinking that painting my nails would be a more effective use of my time, this isn’t going to end well.

If you have a wonderful blind date experience and life happily ever after, fantastic.  For those of us in the real world, blind dates leave you exhausted.  Following the date you not only have to deal with the words ‘giant letdown’ hanging over your head, you also have to deal with the emotional exhaustion brought on by the pre-date worrying and preparation.  “What should I say?  Should I talk about this?  What if he doesn’t like me? Even worse, what if I don’t like him?  That’s awkward” 

Then after a series of not so fabulous rendezvous, or even just one, you start to question whether it's all worth it, the whole dating thing in general.  A few days later you realize that in fact you ARE an eternal optimist and faith in love is once again restored.  

At times, constantly going outside the box, in dating or any other aspect of life,  can be exhausting.  Yes, you have to challenge yourself and have new adventures but the old comfortable adventures are pretty cool too.

Yesterday I went into my closet to grab a sweatshirt and instead of pulling out my pretty new Adidas one; I pulled out my thoroughly worn/five sizes too big college sweatshirt.  Just for old times sake I threw it on and instantly a wave of comfort came over me. 

Sometimes you need to take a break from the wonderful/fabulous things you are doing and do what you've always done.  For me that was grabbing my EC sweatshirt and spending the Sunday afternoon on the couch watching an endless string of B movies.  In my opinion, it’s just as good for the soul as taking a leap of faith. 

And who knows…I hear good things come when you least expect it.  Yesterday I won a water spritzer bottle! Now that doesn’t happen every day, I never win anything!

Till next time

~E

The Tide is Coming...

When are you most at peace?  Since birth my answer to this question has remained the same; Water.  I am most at peace on those bright sunny days, not a cloud in the sky, when your biggest concern is that you are floating too far from the shore.  Smart people tie themselves to the end of the dock but sometimes there is nothing better than feeling like you are drifting away.  The water seems to just rock you back and forth as you drift in and out of conscious bliss.  The struggles of everyday life are standing on the dock and you wave at them with a smile and a nod as you float on down the river.  It is my favorite day.    

As everybody knows, however, sooner or later the tide will bring you back to shore.  Back to reality.  Your only comfort is that someday soon you will once again have a bright and sunny day when all your troubles drift away, if only for a few hours. 

Last night, after a day of floating on the river, I stood on the shore with my feet in the sand, and watched the sun set over the horizon.  It was beautiful.  The tide was coming in and boats were heading for home.  It’s an interesting thing, tides.  One minute you are standing in nothing and the next you are up to your knees in river water.

In a lot of ways life is like the tides.  Good times come and go.  Bad times too.  Relationships, friends, jobs, money, things, experiences; they all ebb and flow.  Sometimes you are knee deep in happiness and other times you barely have your feet wet.  It’s usually during those times that you learn the most about yourself.  It is during low tide that you must reflect.  Reflect on all of the different aspects of your life.  Figure out what works, what doesn’t, what needs to change and how to change it.  Happiness isn’t instantaneous and it isn’t a given, but it is always achievable. 

Throughout the year the tides change and you may never know for sure when high tide will be rolling in.  But just remember that the tide always comes.  Always.  If you don’t believe me, ask mother nature.

Happy Floating!

~E

The Vortex...

So about a month ago the CRAZIEST thing happened! I got SUCKED into a WHIRLWIND.  The Saturday before my birthday I went out to celebrate, (see The Waiting Game, May 8^th)  and I got sucked into a very powerful and tricky vortex known as the Celebratory Vortex.  The Celebratory Vortex is crafty.  It lures you with the promise of never-ending fun, family time, excitement and adventure.  Everything is fantastic!!  Until, of course, the vortex decides to spit you out like old gum and coldheartedly discard you on the side of the road, leaving you to eat its dust. 

Truth: Ok, maybe I wasn’t actually sucked into a Celebratory Vortex…but it sure felt like it.  First and foremost I want to apologize for being M.I.A.  It touches my heart that people have been checking on me and I am sad to have let anyone down.

This past month has been incredibly amazing.  There were wonderful weddings, trips to Europe, and special visits from family and friends that I don’t often get to see.  Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, the Sunday time typically dedicated to my readers had to be dedicated to my guests.  To be perfectly honest, my weekdays were so action packed that sometimes I could barely think of my name let alone an idea for my weekly topic.

What I learned was that as fun and exciting as it all was, I needed to make time for myself and I didn’t.  My ‘down’ time was spent planning my next move and preparing for it.  Without realizing, you begin running on adrenaline and although a lot gets accomplished, a lot gets lost.  Me Time, for some reason, didn’t seem as necessary.     

Have you ever heard of celebrities going into the hospital for exhaustion?  A friend pointed that out to me this week and I think there is a lesson to be learned.  Celebrities have their own vortex and it is filled with excitement, adoring fans, success, paparazzi, untrustworthy people, excessive pressure, and if you are famous for a reason (not like Paris Hilton) you might also have to sing, dance, act etc.  When life gets that crazy, it is so easy to lose yourself.  Sooner or later your body gives up even if your mind keeps going.

On Wednesday morning my body gave up on me.  My last guests left the previous Sunday and due to some poor planning and an extremely overtired brain, Tuesday became a whirlwind in itself.  When my boss walked into work on Wednesday morning the first thing out of her mouth was, “You look horrible.  Do you need to go home?”  I did.  I was Done.  Done with excitement and fun and Done with thinking in general.  I went home and crashed.  Although I am still not completely recovered and the sniffles remain, I now realize the importance taking some time out to just BE.  

Slowing down is not always easy but it is always necessary.  Whether you just sit by yourself for five whole minutes, watch some trashy/mindless television, or float in a pool all weekend with some Miller Light and SPF 30, you must do whatever is necessary to slow your roll.  Trust me.  That vortex is a rough landing.  Seriously, I think I have a bruise…

Have a fun/calm week.  I will see you all next Sunday!  I promiseJ
~E

Bad Reputation...

We’ve all hear about it.  Some of us have even witnessed it.  Worst of all, some of us have been guilty of it.  What is it?  It is that loud obnoxious American tourist.  In my opinion, it is a bad reputation.  If you have travelled outside the US have surly noticed them.  They are clearly out of their element and stick out like a sore thumb.  You’re first instinct is to deny these excessively loud/uncouth people and attempt to disassociate yourself from the embarrassing display of arrogance.

On this trip I was determined to battle the American reputation and immerse myself into a different culture.   My most useful tool in completing this mission was my friend Whitney who, for the past year, had been conducting extremely useful reconnaissance.  She had not only adapted to the culture, habits and pastimes, she had also improved her language fluency and accent.  This would prove most useful considering my very limited Spanish speaking abilities.

My first cultural lesson was on time tables and communication.   Timetables seemed to be negotiable.  As Whitney explained “Open at 9” was more of a suggestion than a definite time.  As I sat in the Madrid airport prior to the last leg of the trip, I watched my departure time go from 20:15 to 21:25 to 21:30 to 21:40 to 21:45.  There was no announcement or change on the main board.  The gate time just kept ticking away.  Having an obsessive need to be on time, I figured my battle was an uphill one.  I decided I better just relax and not stress.  (This proved to be a useful mantra for future endeavors).

As dinner is usually very late and much lighter, compared to US standards, my 10:30pm dinner was not unusual.  The next morning we woke up to my first Spanish breakfast.  Obviously not all Spaniards eat the same breakfast, but this was a fairly common breakfast consumed by Whitney’s roommate and new Spanish boyfriend.  So as a cultural connoisseur I was ready to dive in.  Here's the breakdown.  First you have a mug of heated or cold milk.  Then you select the number of muffins you want.  The muffins of choice were very small and simply called ‘Round Muffins.’  They came in a huge bag and out of curiosity I grabbed it to check the ingredients.  After remembering that I didn't speak Spanish, I handed the bag to Whitney.  To my elation and shock the first ingredient was flour.  In another surprising twist the remaining ingredients were things I understood like water, eggs, salt, and sugar.  The fact that the ingredients in pre-packaged, grocery store food was real food and not processed was amazing to me. 

You take the round muffins; break them up and place the pieces in the milk.  Many of you, like myself, made an “ew soggy muffins?” face.  However it ended up being quite tasty and much better in milk than on their own.  After the muffins, you choose your favorite cookie and dunk it in the milk.  Being that I love chocolate, I chose a cookie with chocolate in the middle and ate up.  When you have sufficiently had your cookies, you put a small spoonful of local honey in your milk and drink the rest.  Are you full yet?

An alternative to this Spanish breakfast is some delicious Café con Leche with your favorite pastry with chocolate inside.  They also have cups of chocolate available...yes you read correctly!  I have tried and loved them all.

After breakfast, people go off to work or in our case go shopping/ to the beach (what a hard life!).  Where we were in Spain almost every place closed from 2-5:30pm.  The very first day, my response to stores closing was, “Are you serious?  Why would places close in the middle of the afternoon?  This is prime shopping time! Hello!?!"  But then it hit me…I was thinking like the obnoxious American traveller.  Americans are used to everything being open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.  When you become accustomed to that type of convenience it is quite a shock to go somewhere else where things are closed during seemingly ‘peak’ hours.  I immediately took a step back.

For many Spaniards the time between 2 and 5:30, is a time to slow down and eat with their family.  Lunch is the biggest meal of the day.  Many people go home for lunch.  Almost all of the restaurants displayed their large lunch menus.  One day we had the traditional Spanish dish Paella, which is rice dish with meat, seafood or both in that particular region.  After lunch, you rested.  I certainly had no objections to that.

At around 5:30 the city came alive again.  Children and family filled the parks and streets.  People were shopping and protesters were shouting. 

You walk everywhere!  I don’t think I have ever walked that much in my life and I have done quite a bit of travelling.  America is not a nation of walkers.  In my opinion it is partly because we were never programmed to walk, we were programmed to drive.  Most of the country developed after the automobile was invented, whereas European was developed many centuries ago.  Distance wise, I could walk to Olde Town where I live.  It is only about 3 miles away.  However, I would only do that if I had a death wish, being required to traverse 2 major highways and a freeway interchange. 

After our day of walking and shopping it was time for dinner.  Dinner was between 9 and 11pm.  Spanish dinner was very light and extremely tasty.  In the southern region I was in, when you ordered a drink you got free Tapas.  Tapas is a very small dish of seafood, meat, rice, vegetable etc.  It is not uncommon to bounce between several different establishments for dinner.  Whitney ate two Tapas and was satisfied for dinner.  The first night, at least, I remember saying, “Umm…yeah…I’m gonna need more food!”

As you can see, food dominated my cultural experience but food is a major part of Spanish culture.  My experience in Spain was not full of historical sites or tourist traps; it was a glimpse into the day to day lives of people halfway around the world.  I couldn’t have asked for a better vacation (minus a few travel mishaps and air traffic control strikes).  It was unique and special and I am incredibly thankful I was able to go.

Whether or not you are a seasoned traveller, or a rookie one, my advice would be to take some time out to experience new culture and food.  Fight that American stereotype and adapt to another place.  As my High School French teacher always said, “Remember it’s not weird, it’s different.”

Europe. Here I Come...

Today I leave for Europe and I can hardly wait!  Travel is something that I love to do but havent done much of the past few years.  I guess that's what happens when you have real job and responsibilities.  How I long for those college days when you could skip some classes and run away for awhile!

How many of you have been outside the country? or even farther outside your state?  I will credit my parents with giving me a sense of adventure and love of traveling to new places.  When I was eight our first family vacation was to South Dakota to see Mt. Rushmore and the Badlands.  We stayed in a tiny motel and shared the 4x4 foot pool with a bunch of bikers.  Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how you look at it, we chose to visit South Dakota during the Sturgis Bike Rally!  Our family mini-van was surrounded by bikers the entire way.  It definitely made the the trip memorable.     

Regardless of weather you take fancy vacations or you are forced to stay in the Red Carpet Inn, where there is nothing red carpet about it!, you are bound to have a few adventures.  At the very least you got to leave home for awhile and experience new and exciting things.  People are always telling me how they want to travel more yet they spend money on other things.  My car has a cracked bumper and has started to rust.  But it is not a menace to the road so I would rather go to Europe:)

Today, at 6:30pm, I am embarking on a week long adventure of who knows what.  Whenever I travel I always keep a journal and this time I will share my adventures with you.

TO BE CONTINUED...

The List...

How many of you out there are list makers?  I’m not just talking about honey-do lists or grocery lists; I’m talking about Life lists.  People make lists for all sorts of reasons.  The Bucket list, for example, is a list of things you want to do before you die.  A Love list is a list of traits you want in the ideal mate; tall, handsome, not a moron etc.

The thing about lists is that they are easy to make but hard to get through.  How many times in your life have you been able to cross every single item off of your list?

Last year I wanted to have an amazing summer, so I made a list of things I thought would be fun to do.  I called it my “Summer List,” because I am incredibly original.  I started off the summer with much anticipation and motivation.  This was going to happen and it was going to be awesome!!  However, life threw me some curve balls and I found myself in mid-July without one single item crossed off my list.  Rather demoralized, I halfheartedly completed a few tasks and deemed it a moderately successful summer.    

This past weekend, my friend Lauren and I celebrated our birthdays by going dancing and going to Kings Dominion to ride roller coasters.  About half way there I realized that going to Kings Dominion was something on my “Summer List” that never crossed off.  “Pretty cool,” I thought, “I’m going to cross something off my list.”  Sure the list was for intended for the previous summer but hey, I still did it!

That got me thinking.  In essence my “Summer List” was a few fun things that I always wanted to try or do.  The only reason that I stopped trying was because of some ridiculous time constraint I gave myself.

When we have a list of things to do and restraints on when or how to do them, the integrity of the list gets lost.  People let themselves be held back by age, time, or expectations.  Too many lists just sit around and collect dust because people have forgotten or given up on them.  If you hit 30 and haven’t traveled out of the country or landed our dream job or dream mate, you tend to crumple up and throw away your list.  But in reality who cares if you cross off things before 30 or after 30 or after 50?  The point is that you CROSSED THEM OFF!

If there is something you’ve always wanted to do, or multiple things you’ve always wanted to do, then get up and do them.  Time isn’t waiting for you and it will most certainly pass you by.  Lists are simply a compilation of things you want to have, see or do!  Cross a few things off your list and you’ll be amazed at how spectacular it feels!!

~E

The Summer List: In Review!

(Black-Not Accomplished, Blue-Accomplished, Green-Work in Progress)

1.       Get a Tan-Last summer, this was most certainly not accomplished.  So far this year I have purchased a few tanning sessions in order to stave off the inevitable burn.  We will wait and see.  I’ll let you know come September.

2.       Go Paintballing-What kind of mood was I in when I wrote this list? Now only moderately appealing.

3.       Make it to Kings Dominion-It took me a year but I did it!  We walked onto every ride with no lines and did some twice.  Twenty four hours later I am still a little dizzy and motion sick but it was worth it!!

4.       Learn to Play the Guitar-I learned one really easy song but then I got lazy and quit.  Perhaps I should pony up for some professional lessons. 

5.       Run a 10k-On the Agenda

6.       Race in a Sprint Triathlon-Have a training plan and I am definitely, almost positively, for sure, maybe going to do it.

7.       Go Boating-I have a standing invitation for a day of boating fun.   My only hesitation is the Redneck Factor.  I am the flame and they are the Moths and it would be like bringing a flame to a Moth convention.  Also, with this crew, I don’t know if my liver could handle it.

8.       Have a Bonfire and Make S'mores-That was pretty tasty.  I think #8 needs to be redone a.s.a.p.

9.       Take Surfing Lessons- No idea how that one is supposed to happen but I’ll keep brainstorming.

10.   Go Sky Diving- If I can save enough money and can find people willing to go then it’s on like Donkey Kong.

11.   Go Bungee Jumping and/or Slingshot-That was ridiculously fun.  I swear I saw to Chicago!

12.   Go to a Nats Game-So close yet so far!  I’m going to a Brewers game.  Does that count?

13.   Go Horseback Riding- I know some people with horses so this could be a possibility…

14.   Learn How to Shoot a Gun-  The motivation is a little low on that one.  Guns are scary yet I feel I should learn about them…

15.   Ride on a Motorcycle- There is one reason why this wasn’t accomplished.  Thought of Me+ Speed+ Pavement+ Pain= Not happening yetJ

16.   Stay up all Night and Watch the Sunrise on the Beach-Whitney, if you are reading this, I think Spain is the perfect place for this one because I will be 5 hours behind and the chances of me staying up that late are about 1000x better!!!

The Waiting Game...

(The Jeopardy Song)

Do do do do /do do do

Do do do do/do/do do do do do

When this song gets played, every JEOPARDY contestant knows that Alex Trebek is waiting for their answer.  Waiting for answers… (heavy sigh).  I don’t know about you but sometimes I get tired of playing the waiting game!  We wait in traffic, we wait in lines, we wait our turn.  We wait for things, we wait for people, we wait for service, we wait for answers, we wait for change.  Seriously, how many hours of our lives do we spend waiting?

Patience has never been my strong suit.  Some things are better than others.  For instance I have become a very patient driver and line dweller, unless of course I’m in a hurry.  I detest being late for anything. 

Some thing I have a hard time waiting for is food.  When I’m hungry, I have to eat.  It’s  like a bear in the woods.  There are certain times during the day when I need to be eating and if I am not, it is quite an unpleasant situation.  Knowing this about myself, however, I am usually prepared with some sort of small snack to hold me over until a meal can be arranged.

Moving onto bigger things, when it comes to waiting out life’s unknown answers, I do a pretty decent job.  I know deep down that it just takes a little patience and a lot of faith.  But no one on this planet is an ace at the waiting game.

While celebrating my impending birthday,  the waiting game became a topic of discussion between my friend Wendy and myself.  Birthdays are always a time of reflection.  However when that period of reflection gets mixed with Vodka, thenconversation, shall we say, gets a little more animated.  You see, when I mix Vodka with mild irritation, my patience for waiting in general disappears.  Nothing and no one is safe.  Anyone who has been privy to an amusing yet over-the-top rant on the bouquet toss or been on the receiving end of a disgruntled New Year’s Eve text and/or phone call, can tell you this is true. 

Vodka and obscure rants aside, whether it is in line or in life, everyone gets tired of waiting.  Life is full of puzzles and paradigms, and there will always be questions that need answering.  Why did this happen? Where is my life going?  When will I get a job?  When will I meet that special someone?  When will I have children?  When will I catch a break? When is this waiting game going to end and when will I get some answers?

Hang in there!  No one ever really knows where life is going to take them.  You will always go through periods of faith and periods of doubt, and you may not always love the answers or see the logic, but life has a way of working out exactly like it's supposed to. 

Think of life as a long grocery store line.  At first its OK.  You’ve accepted that it may take a while and you’re willing to wait it out.  As the minutes tick away, and you are stuck behind a woman that is apparently stocking up for nuclear disaster, you start to get a little edgy and irritated.  But, just when you think you can’t take it anymore, the cashier says to the woman in front of you, “Would you like the receipt with you or in the bag?" YES! Freedom is upon us!! (heavy sigh) 

Throughout life you will surely find yourself in the middle numerous grocery store lines.  When you do, remember to take a deep breath, grab a vodka/tonic and the ear of a good friend, and know that someday soon the wait will be over!

~E